Reviews Of What Is In Theaters Now

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Posted by on in Movie Reviews


Rated: PG

Release Date: October 16, 2015

Director: Rob Letterman

Stars: Jack Black, Dylan Minnette, Odeya Rush, Ryan Lee

Plot: When a boy suspects foul play at the neighbors' house, he finds out that R.L. Stein's monsters are real



Clint Says: Wait until after opening weekend, but see this in theaters



Jack Black belongs in the Awesomeness Hall of Fame. He is so much fun as the mysterious R.L.Stein. That, combined with the unique story line for this movie, makes it one worth seeing. It is a fun, funny, somewhat scary film that kids from 8 to 88 will enjoy. 


Fans of the books and TV show will enjoy this movie thoroughly, but it is just fine for those of you that have never delved into the GOOSEBUMPS world. The writers and director do a great job of catching you up without making it boring for the big fans.


The only thing I wish was better about this movie are the monsters. The CGI feels like it is from about 10 years ago. I liked the monsters, but the amateurish graphics kept pulling me out of the story with how obviously fake the monsters were. (I know. I know. Monsters are fake. But they could at least look real). 


This film is like a gateway drug for horror flicks. If you don't like horror films, but you want to get into the Halloween spirit a bit, this film should satisfy your craving. I wouldn't take any kids under six or seven to see this movie, but it is rated PG, so it's pretty tame for most families. 


Also, be on the lookout for a special appearance by R.L. Stein. It's a fun moment. 

Posted by on in Movie Reviews


Rated: R

Release Date: October 16, 2015

Director: Guillermo del Toro

Stars: Tom Hiddleston, Mia Wasikowska, Jessica Chastain, Charlie Hunnam

Plot: An American woman is lured into the evil plans of a European man and woman. 



Clint Says: Save some money and see a matinee



As far as horror movies go, this is one of the better ones. It is much more along the lines of true horror rather than slasher flick. That said, it still had a few eye rolling moments of cliche horror movie antics. 


The one thing that sets this movie apart from most horror films is the cast. They do an incredible job and make what could have been a rather bland film into something worth seeing. However, all of you SONS OF ANARCHY fans will be expecting Charlie Hunnam to hop on a motorcycle at any moment, because his character has many similar mannerisms to Jax Teller. 


If you are looking for a suspenseful thriller with a good ghost story to get you in the mood for Halloween, CRIMSON PEAK is a great choice. 

Posted by on in Movie Reviews


Rated: R

Release Date: September 25, 2015

Director: Eli Roth

Stars: Lorenza Izzo, Ariel Levy, Aaron Burns

Plot: A group of environmentalists on a mission to help save the rain forests are captured by Amazonian cannibals.



Clint Says: Don't even bother



Oh, what could have been. This film had all of the opportunity in the world to be a spectacularly scary horror flick. Instead, it is a spectacular fail.


The actin is atrocious, the plot it ridiculous, it's way too long, it's not even remotely scary, it's full of massive plot holes and moments of convenience, and the audience is given no real reason to care about any of the characters.


This movie is extremely violent and gory, but most of that looks completely fake. And some of the violence doesn't even make sense.


The only thing even remotely decent about this flick is that it has a few moments that are somewhat suspenseful, but even those moments aren't really scary.


We've almost made it to October, save your money for a horror flick that is actually worth seeing.

Posted by on in Movie Reviews


Rated: PG-13

Release Date: September 11, 2015

Director: M. Night Shyamalan

Stars: Olivia DeJonge, Ed Oxenbould, Deanna Dunagan, Peter McRobbie

Plot: Siblings go to their estranged grandparents house for a week. While they try to patch things up, strange happenings start to occur.



Clint Says: Wait until after opening weekend, but see this in theaters



It's been 16 long years since M. Night Shyamalan gave us THE SIXTH SENSE. Since then he's done a lot, but nothing spectacular, and a few downright stinkers. THE VISIT is a return to his glory days.


This is a great horror film. It's not a scary, slasher flick, but rather a true, classic-style horror film that will terrify you. The audience I saw this movie with were jumping and screaming and fidgeting in their seats almost the entire film.


I almost want to call this a "found footage" film, but it really isn't. It's shot by the characters, but it's done in documentary style. This is nice because we, the audience, don't have to deal with a lot of shaky camera or poor framing.


Ed Oxenbould, (ALEXANDER AND THE TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD DAY), completely steals the show. He is riotously funny throughout the film, and gives a stellar performance on top of that.


In my time I've seen a lot of horror flicks and one thing has always been true. The scarier the movie the more people will go to the bathroom. This film had a steady stream of people heading out to take a potty break and a breather from the intensity.


If you like scary movies, you will love THE VISIT.

Posted by on in Movie Reviews


Rated: R

Director: Ciaran Foy

Stars: James Ransone, Shannyn Sossamon, Robert Daniel Sloan, Dartanian Sloan

Plot: A family is terrorized by the Boogeyman while a PI tries to figure out what is going on



Clint Says: Don't even bother



I am almost positive I could feel IQ points slipping from my mind as I sat through this utter waste of time. I actually got a headache from my eyes rolling so often.


The only thing good about this movie is the end. I don't mean the ending, but the actual end. The part where the credits are at the end. Everything before that is horrible.


The acting (if you can even call it that) is as bad as IT FOLLOWS, the plot is stupid and convoluted, the scares are minimal and most of them are the lame jump-out-and-say-boo scares, and the main characters are so annoying I was actually wishing something bad would happen to them.


This film is 95 minutes long. About 70 minutes of it is boring, about 15 minutes of it is annoying, about 5 minutes of it is slightly suspenseful, and then there are 5 minutes of glorious end credits.


Save your money, and hopefully we will get a good horror flick in October.

Posted by on in Movie Reviews


Rated: R

Director: Travis Cluff, Chris Lofing

Stars: Reese Mishler, Pfeifer Brown, Ryan Shoos, Cassidy Gifford

Plot: Students try to bring back a play in which a student died while performing several years earlier, but an evil presence has other ideas.



Clint Says: Save some money and see a matinee



Shockingly, I was pleasantly surprised by this horror flick. It is by no means a great film, but the story is fairly interesting, and the twist is one you will never see coming.


The downside is that this is another "found footage" film, and with this one they barely even attempt to give a reason for why they are carrying cameras around the whole time. And if you think for more than three seconds about the reason why they are having to use the cameras, you will realize it is a plot hole the size of Texas.


THE GALLOWS isn't an overly scary film, but the scares that are there are almost all legitimate, (with one hilarious exception). That said, this film will make for a fun date night full of suspense and chills.